Just had my Baby and Don't Want to Keep it

Have you just given birth and are thinking, “I want to give my baby up for adoption?” We know you have many questions when considering adoption after delivering your baby. We are addressing some common questions below.

I’m at the hospital and don’t want my baby. Is it too late to choose adoption?

If you are in labor or are postpartum and at the hospital, it is still not too late to move forward with adoption for your baby. No matter your circumstances, we can come and meet with you to process through how you are feeling, offer you other resources should you want to parent, or work with you to plan the type of adoption that you want. We work with women frequently after they have already given birth and are in the hospital, or are even already home parenting. It’s not too late to contact us.

This wasn’t an unplanned pregnancy, but I changed my mind. Am I too late?

Whether this was a planned pregnancy, unplanned or unexpected, it does not matter for the purposes of adoption. If now that this baby is already born you feel unprepared to parent, adoption is still an option for you. Very often women plan their pregnancies but things can change, whether the birth father is out of the picture, or family members who offered help disappear. Now that you have delivered and can get a sense of the level of support that you have around you, you might have an easier time making decisions.

Should you decide to call Open Arms, an adoption professional will come out and offer you counseling, free of charge, to help you determine the best option for you and your baby. We work on last minute adoptions frequently and are able to provide you counseling and support at any point in the process. If you think you would like to choose and meet a potential adoptive family, it is most definitely not too late and we can offer you the option to look at adoptive family profiles and find an adoptive family that you feel good about. If you prefer a semi-open adoption, and perhaps you would like to choose the family but not meet them, we can help you with that as well. Just because you have already given birth does not make it too late for you to have these options available to you.

Should I put my baby up for adoption?

Only you can answer this question, but adoption agencies like Open Arms are here to help guide you through your options and the various aspects of the adoption process. Our counselors are standing by 24/7 to answer your questions about adoption. Open Arms also offers interim care to give you time to make a decision. At Open Arms, we will never pressure you into choosing adoption. Every situation is different, and you need the right information and guidance to make your own decision.

Since I already gave birth, how is the adoption process different?

You might be wondering how the adoption process is different since you have already given birth. While things might move a bit faster, the options available to you are the same as they would be if you were still pregnant, aside from abortion. You still have the option to choose adoption vs. parenting or foster care, if there is the possibility of the baby being taken into state custody. Many women choose adoption after giving birth specifically because of the threat of foster care.

The Hospital Social Worker said that Child Protective Services is Being Called. What are my Options?

If you have concerns about your baby being put into foster care, and this is not something that you wish to happen, voluntary adoption might be worth exploring. With adoption, your preferences for an adoptive family are taken into account, versus the baby being placed with a foster family that you would have no control over. Many new moms, especially those with older children in foster care prefer to choose adoption and sign adoption paperwork rather than foster care for their baby. With adoption, the adoptive parents would become the permanent parents of the baby, and your parental rights would be terminated, however there is still an opportunity to have a relationship with your child. As a Birth Mother, you could get pictures, letters and updates as well has have get-togethers with your child and the family of your choice. This can be an empowering option for you if you feel that you do not have the family support to parent this newborn. Many new moms find comfort in the idea of knowing where their baby will end up and that they can maintain a relationship with them.

How do I find a family to adopt my baby?

Finding a family for your child is easy when you work with an adoption agency such as Open Arms. We have many families that are ready and waiting to adopt. You can review profiles which include letters, photos and information about our families to give you a sense of who they are. Should you move forward with adoption, you can choose the family that you feel would be the best fit for your child.

How Does the Adoption Agency Support the Birth Family?

The adoption agency, and specifically your social worker, can support you fully through this process. Even in a last minute adoption, your counselor can spend time with you in the hospital, discuss your adoption and parenting options and help you from here. Should you choose to move forward with adoption, they will go through the adoption papers so that you feel clear and confident on everything and understand everything that you are signing. They can speak with the hospital staff to make sure that your needs are getting met while you are there and that they are taking care of you. They can help make sure that your medical expenses are taken care of so that you don’t receive any unexpected medical bills when you leave. Birth Parents feel supported and good about having someone there to support them and offer them hand-holding through this part of the process.

Where can I find an adoption agency near me?

Open Arms offers local offices in several locations including Philadelphia, Northern New Jersey, Southern New Jersey, New York, and Delaware.

If I give up my baby for adoption, will I ever see them again?

You have options when it comes to the type of adoption you choose. A confidential adoption allows for complete privacy and confidentiality. A semi-closed adoption keeps you in contact with your child’s new family through the ongoing involvement of the adoption agency. An open adoption will provide letters and photographs, and visits with the child and family.

With Open Arms, you decide the amount and type of future contact you will have with the child. This is based on your personal desires and there is no right answer as to what type of adoption you should choose.

It’s never too late to contact Open Arms Adoption for adoption information and help. Even if you haven’t considered adoption before, a local adoption agency such as Open Arms can help you look at all of your options. It’s not too late to make an adoption plan for your child. For more information about adoption options after delivering a baby, call Open Arms Adoption today at 1-888-OPENARMS or email us. Our counselors are available 24/7.