If you are currently 6 months pregnant, and getting stressed about this new baby coming soon, that is completely normal! You are likely in the “honeymoon” phase of your pregnancy, morning sickness has hopefully slowed down, and you have more time to think about what the coming months will bring. This may get you worried about the sleepless nights, a crying baby, money, housing, childcare and how you might balance everything in your life. Below we will explain a bit more about what is coming up these next few months and how to get support, should you decide that you need it.
If You Aren’t Sure about the Pregnancy
If you are about less than five months along and you aren’t sure if you want to continue your pregnancy, you may still have other options. The best way to find out if termination/ abortion is still an option is to contact our partners at The Women’s Centers. They can provide an ultrasound in order to find out exactly how far along you are, and can discuss your termination options with you, if you are legally able to still get one at this point in your pregnancy.
If You Want to Keep the Pregnancy, But You Are Not Sure if you are Ready to be a New Mom
If you know that you do not want an abortion or perhaps you would have chosen to get an abortion, but you are too far along in your pregnancy, but you are not sure that keeping the baby is a good idea, you might want to learn more about adoption. Adoption isn’t what you’ve seen on TV and movies, it looks much different nowadays. In modern adoption, YOU have options and get to choose not only the type of adoption that you want, but you can choose the Adoptive Family for your baby, and the type of relationship you have with them. There are three types of adoption, Confidential, Semi-Open and Open Adoption, and should you decide to contact Open Arms Adoption Network by calling 1-888-OPENARMS and talk with a Counselor, they will review all of these options with you in detail.
In an Open Adoption, the Birth Mother and adoptive family stay in contact with one another through letters, phone calls, and visits. The Birth Mother and the adoptive family and child typically have direct contact and are given the opportunity to maintain a relationship on their own, with some assistance from Open Arms—as we are always just a phone call away if ever needed. You don’t have to stay in touch with each other in any particular way, rather YOU can choose the mode of contact that you feel most comfortable with. It’s possible that you feel ready to meet a hopeful adoptive family during your pregnancy, and then stay in touch directly, in which case you absolutely can. You are also able to stay in touch with the family and the baby via letters and phone calls, if meeting with them face-to-face feels like too much for you. This is completely YOUR decision, and one that we will support you in, without any pressure. You can work with your counselor to figure out what you are most comfortable with, and we will honor that decision fully.
In a Semi-Open Adoption, the birth mom stays connected to the adoptive family and baby but with the help of Open Arms as the in-between contact. There is no direct contact between the birth family and the adoptive family in a Semi-Open Adoption. If you choose a Semi-Open Adoption, you can maintain your privacy, while continuing to stay updated on how your baby is doing. You can expect Open Arms Adoption to stay in contact with you and pass along photos, letters and updates so you know exactly how the baby is doing. And, in a Semi Open Adoption, your counselor will accompany you when/if you want to visit with the baby and family. Sometimes, women find this as a good option in the beginning, when the concept of an Open Adoption feels too difficult.
Sometimes, after maintaining a Semi-Open Adoption for a bit, a Birth Mom becomes more open and interested in having an Open Adoption and would like to get together with the Adoptive Family on her own or perhaps with the support of a family member or good friend. This is an option for you at any point if you decide to move forward with an adoption through Open Arms Adoption, so you never need to feel pressured that the decision you make regarding the type of adoption you choose is final. We are here for you, forever, and can always help you move toward an Open Adoption should you want that in the future.
In a Closed Adoption or Confidential Adoption, the Birth Mom maintains privacy and confidentiality from the Adoptive Family and the child. Sometimes, women who might choose to put their baby up for adoption might feel the the idea of staying connected to the Adoptive Family and receiving updates about the baby is just “too much” emotionally. For these women, considering a Confidential Adoption might feel like a good option. Often, women feel that they need some space in the beginning, so a Confidential Adoption feels right to them. And, please know that all of our adoptive families who are waiting are screened and fully prepared to adopt a baby, so please be assured that the family that adopts your baby is a wonderful one that is completely ready and excited to adopt!
The Last Trimester
Should you choose to move forward with your pregnancy, you may be wondering what this last part of your pregnancy will be like—how you will feel, doctor’s appointments and all the other details. While everyone is different and experiences different pregnancy side effects, typically, the last trimester tends to be the most uncomfortable. Your belly is likely getting pretty big by now, and getting comfortable while sleeping might be difficult, so you may not be sleeping well. You also may find that the pressure that the baby is putting on your bladder makes you need to urinate frequently, which can also interrupt your sleep. You will start to have more frequent visits at the doctor, moving from monthly to every two weeks and eventually going weekly at the very end of your pregnancy. This is all to ensure the health and safety of you and the baby and to monitor growth.
Eventually, it will be time to go to the hospital to deliver. This may be a couple of weeks early, or even a couple of weeks late, depending on your pregnancy and what your doctor thinks is best. Receiving prenatal care is especially important, so that you can be monitored for any signs of distress when you get close to your delivery date. Hopefully, you end up having a very easy birth, when it comes time to deliver!
If you are nervous about this pregnancy and want to learn more about adoption, we can help you. Contact us anytime at 1-888-OPENARMS and we will support you through your decision-making process, without any pressure. You can also check out some of our current waiting adoptive families that could be the right fit for you and your baby.