Is Open Adoption Right for Me and My Baby?

How can I decide what type of adoption is best for me?

If you are considering whether adoption might be the right choice for you and your baby, you might be thinking more about what adoption might look like for you and them in the future. If you choose to work with Open Arms Adoption, you are completely in control of your plan, and the type of adoption that works for you, should you choose to move forward. When you meet or talk on the phone with your Open Arms counselor, one of the topics we will discuss with you are the differences between the three types of adoptions, so you can learn more and think about what you might want. You will learn more about what to expect with each type of adoption: Open, Semi Open Adoption and Confidential Adoption.

Open Adoption

An Open Adoption is one in which the Birth Mother and adoptive family stay in contact with one another through letters, phone calls, and visits. Birth Moms and the adoptive family and child will usually have direct contact and be given the opportunity to maintain a relationship on their own, with help from Open Arms always a phone call away if ever needed. You can choose the mode of contact that you feel most comfortable with. You may be ready to meet a family in the very beginning, and then stay in touch directly, in which case you absolutely can. But you also have the option to stay in touch via letters and phone calls, if meeting the family in person feels like too much for you. This is a personal decision, and we will support you with whatever you choose, without any pressure. Your counselor will help you figure out what is right for you.

Semi-Open Adoption

With a Semi-Open Adoption, the birth mother chooses to stay connected to the adoptive family and baby but with Open Arms as the in-between contact. There is no direct contact between birth parents and the adoptive family in a Semi-Open Adoption. In this situation, you would have the opportunity to maintain your privacy, while continuing to stay updated on how your baby is doing. Open Arms Adoption will stay in touch with you and pass along photos, letters and updates so you know how the baby is doing. Sometimes, women find this as a good option in the beginning, when the concept of an Open Adoption feels too emotional. Often, after women maintain a Semi-Open Adoption for a period of time, they then become more interested in getting together with the Adoptive Family and they begin to consider an Open Adoption after feeling more comfortable. This is absolutely an option for you at any point, so never feel pressured that the decision you make with regard to the type of adoption you choose is final, as we are here for you, forever, and will help you move toward an Open Adoption if this is what you would like in the future. It is always an option available to you.

Confidential/Closed Adoption

In a Closed or Confidential Adoption, the Birth Mom can maintain complete privacy and confidentiality from the Adoptive Family and the child as he/she grows. If you are thinking that you want to learn more about adoption, but the idea of staying connected to the Adoptive Family and receiving updates on how the baby is doing is just “too much” emotionally, you might want to consider a Confidential Adoption. Sometimes women feel that some space in the beginning is needed, so they choose a Confidential Adoption. All of our waiting families are screened and fully prepared to adopt a baby, so you never need to worry that the family that adopts your baby is not a wonderful one completely ready and excited to be a parent – even to become a parent today!

Some Things to Think About

Now that you know a little bit about each type of adoption, you can begin to think about what you might feel most comfortable with right now. Are you thinking that you absolutely want to choose and meet the family that will adopt your baby and to stay in touch? If that feels right to you, then an Open Adoption is likely a good fit for you. Are you uncomfortable with the idea of choosing a family right now? Are you feeling like you need some space emotionally and you do not want to meet a family? If so, you might like to talk more about Semi-Open or Confidential Adoption. You may not have even thought this far yet, and you may just have decided that adoption is an option that you would like to consider. That is completely fine, this information is just here to answer any preliminary questions you may have. Your Open Arms Adoption Counselor will review all of this with you, and be sure to address all of your questions so that you feel completely comfortable with your plan.

Your Adoption Plan Can Change

You may be thinking right now that you would want an Open Adoption, but you aren’t sure. Or, you may be leaning toward a Confidential Adoption, but you are concerned about the future, in case you change your mind and you do have a desire to receive pictures of the baby or visit together. Even with a Confidential/ Closed Adoption, there is flexibility, and if a birth mother decides she wants to connect with the adoptive family at any time in the future, an Open Arms Adoption Counselor will happily help you through that process. We will be here for you the entire time, supporting your decisions and helping you navigate the relationship with the adoptive family, if you choose Open Adoption.

You likely have lots of questions about adoption. We are here to talk with you by phone, text or email and we are happy to meet you at a location of your choice to talk about the adoption process and to answer all of your questions. Contact us to speak to an adoption counselor today. You will never feel any pressure from us along the way. We can help you on the next steps to learn more about the adoption process. Call 1-888-OPENARMS, email us at info@openarmsadoption.net anytime, or text us at 267.961.2720, we are always here for you. If you would like to look for a family for your baby, please visit our waiting adoptive families page.